Journy to Contentment - Part 4

I began a series ages ago about contentment... and my intention was to write every Tuesday about my personal journey to contentment (which is certainly not over!) and I sort of wanted to keep that going.

My last post was about offering a humble heart before God as a means to contentment. Today I want to address Greed.

"Discontentment makes rich men poor 

while contentment makes poor men rich." 

Benjamin Franklin

Take a moment to think about everything that you have: All of your possessions: house, furniture, decorations, knick knacks, car, money, clothing...Family: husband, children, parents, siblings...Other Relationships: Church family, elders, friends...

Now realize that none of it actually belongs to you!! It all belongs to God and he is gracious enough to loan it to you. 

With that kind of thinking the next logical thing to realize is that because everything we have has been graciously lent to us, what right do we have to complain and covet about what we do not have!?

And yet, how often in my life do I covet what another has. How often do I become discontent with my house, clothing, car, relationships etc. as though I actually deserved better than what I have! How often do I get those overwhelming "urges" to just go to Walmart or Frenchies not because I truly need something but just because I want something...something...Not sure what it is that I want, but I just know I want something.

Linda Dillow in her book Calm my Anxious Heart reminds us that our Heart Attitude is the issue. She quotes this scripture:

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, 

where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.

But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven,

where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.

for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Matthew 6:19-21

"Ask yourself: Where is my treasure? Where is my heart? Simple questions, yet the answers define who you are and what you are living for...You can quickly identify where your heart is if you will survey the things you own and answer this question: Suppose this treasure were lost, destroyed, or stolen tomorrow. Would I miss it to the point that it would harm my trust in God, my contentment, or my relationships? If the answer is Yes, then your treasure is on earth."

{Side note: During Family worship last evening, I was reminded that our treasure should be Christ and His Word! It is worth far more than silver or gold or jewels.}

I really love this book and enjoyed it so much when we read through it together at our monthly Ladies Fellowship Meetings. In this chapter on greed Dillow gives several practical strategies for rooting out greed in your own life. Here is one that really stuck out to me.

"Cut the Ropes"

Greed is like a large weight attached to you by a rope. Look around your house and ask God to show you where to cut the ropes. 

                 Are there certain items that you tend to cling to or are just simply never contented with? 

                               Give them away! 

                 Are there catalogs or fliers that cause you to covet? 

                               Throw them out!

                 Are there certain friends that give you the greedies?? 

                                Stay away from them! 

                                (Or pray a lot before visiting them if staying away is not an option)

As Matthew 18:8 says "And if your hand or your foot causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life crippled or lame than with two hands or two feet to be thrown into the eternal fire."

A personal area that I always seem to be discontented with is my clothing! I have drawers and a closet stuffed full and yet can never seem to find anything to wear! And I always want to buy more! So my goal this week (after I return from a visit with my Mom, Sister, Brother-in-law, and Brand New Nephew!!) is to go through all of my clothing and give most of them away... And pray that God will make me content with what I have.

Do you have a rope to cut? or perhaps one you have cut in the past? May the Lord continue to convict our hearts of these things. This world is not our home.

The Lord's Day

(A Lord's Day Evening prayer taken from Joseph Pipa's book The Lord's Day)

Most Holy God,
May the close of an earthly sabbath
              remind me that the last of them will one day end.
Animate me with joy that in heaven praise will never cease,
              that adoration will continue forever,
              that no flesh will grow weary,
                            no congregations disperse,
                            no affections flag,
                            no thoughts wander,
                            no will droop,
                            but all will be adoring love.
Guard my mind from making ordinances my stay or trust,
                                         from hewing out broken cisterns,
                                         from resting on outward helps.
Wing me through earthly forms to thy immediate presence;
May my feeble prayers show me the emptiness and vanity of my own sins;
Deepen in me the conviction that my most fervent prayers,
             and most lowly confessions, need to be repented of.
May my best services bring me nearer to the cross,
             and prompt me to cry, 'None but Jesus!'
By the Spirit give abiding life to the lessons of this day:
May the seed sown take deep root and yield a full harvest.
Let all who see me take knowledge that I have been with thee
             that thou hast taught me my need as a sinner,
                            hast revealed a finished salvation to me,
                            hast enriched me with all spiritual blessings,
                            hast chosen me to show forth Jesus to others,
                            hast helped me to dispel the mists of unbelief.
O great creator, mighty protector, gracious preserver,
                           thou dost load me with lovingkindnesses,
                           and hast made me thy purchased possession,
                           and redeemed me from all guilt;
I praise and bless thee for my sabbath rest, my calm conscience,
                                                                               my peace of heart.

Journey to Contentment - Part 3

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God

that at the proper time He may exalt you,

casting all your anxieties upon Him,

because He cares for you.

1 Peter 5:6-7

Offering a Humble Heart Before God

This point takes us further along Linda Dillow's book to the chapter called "Worry is like a Rocking Chair". (I didn't go in order of chapters for my acrostic) She hits the nail right on the head with that title! Worrying "will give you something to do, but it won't get you anywhere"! That's so true.

There are certain things that never really worry me. I know God will provide financially. I never worry about not having clothes on my back or a roof over my head. God has placed so many wonderful people in our lives that always seem to be right there when you need them. We have seen God work in these ways over and over again.

But then again, there are other things that can sometimes really get to me. When I first started reading this chapter, it was miscarriage. 

When I found out that we were expecting again I was *delighted!* So happy and excited. So thankful that God would give us another child! And then the sickness began and my spirits began to sink. (I found with both of my pregnancies that this was a very low time for me.) And then worry hit me like a dark cloud. Every time I thought of being pregnant I felt discouraged and afraid. I couldn't fulfill my daily tasks. Even doing laundry and cooking for my family was really hard! 

The reading in the chapter started to make me think about and wonder why I was so fearful and angry. I realized that it was because I knew that it wasn't just the wicked who lost their babies. It was the children of God too. I started thinking of other things that worried me like rape, murder, car accidents, etc. God allows these things to happen to His children!! I heard about a missionary whose orphanage was broken in to. Her husband was killed, she was raped! God why would you allow that!? They were serving you in a foreign land, sacrificing comforts for your name's sake and you would let this happen? I was angry! If I wouldn't let things like that happen to my children, then why would God let them happen to His?

And then I read "Humble yourselves, therefore, under the might hand of God". Let me quote from Dillow. She says it well.

"Many of us have memorized 1 Peter 5:7 and tucked it away to be pulled out whenever we have a problem. Too often, though, in applying the wonderful part about "casting all your cares" we forget the first part about "humbling ourselves under the sovereign, mighty hand of God." Not only are the two verses one thought, they are one sentence! They must be read together and applied together. 

What does it mean to humble ourselves before the mighty hand of God? Humility means to have total trust in God alone. It is the surrender of our total being -- intellect, emotion, will, plans, and judgments. It is relinquishing everything. For me, humbling myself involves yielding to God as the Blessed Controller of whatever situation or person is causing me anxiety."

 Somewhere along the line, I made a mistake about God's character. He is the Blessed Controller. His thoughts are higher than my thoughts. His ways are higher than my ways (Is. 55:9). He can see the whole of creation from beginning to end whereas I can only see one little tiny part. God doesn't just forget about us little specks of dust on this earth (although he has every right to!). He hasn't just forgotten the Moms and Dads who have gone through the terrible loss of a baby. He hasn't just forgotten about that missionary. He has planned everything for a purpose, for His Glory, for our good.

And even though I will never understand it this side of heaven, I just know that I need to humble my heart and trust Him, for he cares for me.

My Journey to Contentment - Part 2C

This will be my final post on the topic of "Considering the Cup/Portion that God has given you". To see the previous part click here.

I began in part 2 speaking about how God has given everyone a beautiful and unique cup. Even Jesus Christ had a cup while he was on this earth. Luke 22:42 shows us our dear Lord and Saviour in Prayer before his Father. He knew the cup that the Father had given him. To die on the cross for the sins of His people. And so he prayed, "Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me." This cup was a very difficult one to bear! We certainly can't blame Him for asking this of His Father. But what he says next shows the ultimate example of submission and for our purposes, contentment. "Nevertheless, not my will, but yours be done."

Dillow points out that what Christ was essentially doing was taking His cup and holding it up to the Father and saying "I accept this cup Father. I know it will be difficult and painful to bear, but I know that Your will and Your plans are perfect and I will follow them for Your glory!"

Is that what I was doing with the cup that God had given me? With the portion of Motherhood? Unfortunately, No. I took a sip of my portion and I spat it out! I took my cup and I smashed it! I didn't want it. Take the cup, God! I'll go find my own cup. Meanwhile, I would be miserable and discontented.

I prayed and asked for the Lord to forgive me for not accepting the cup and portion that He had given to me. I realized that I wasn't thinking about His Glory. I was thinking about my own. I was thinking about my own comforts and pleasures. I was being selfish. 1 John 1:9: "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness". Thank you Lord for that!

The lesson wasn't over though. The Lord still needed to show me in a way that I would never forget! That very same evening I went into my pumpkin's room to check on her and I found her laying perfectly still with her eyes wide open. I stood there for what seemed like hours waiting for her to move or breathe or cry or anything that would tell me that she was still alive! As I waited there I cried out to God in my mind, "I just  learned to accept this cup today and you are going to take it away from me!" Just then, she closed her eyes and turned her head. She was alive!

I left the room very shaken up. My legs were weak, my heart was pounding, I started crying and had to sit down. It was like a slap in the face - one that I deserved!

Of course this scenario of going into the room and wondering if she was still alive had happened many times before and many times since. I'm sure every parent knows of it! But this time, God really seemed to draw out those few seconds!

After this, I wrote in my journal:

I needed that Lord. Thank You. Both for your justice and your mercy. I am learning to accept this cup and portion that you have given! Help me with this! So that I may bring glory and honour to you.

 I am still learning. And God is still helping me. 

My Journey to Contentement - Part 2

Today I am going to share with you the first major step on my journey to contentment. If you missed my introduction to this series, be sure to read it here.

Considering the Cup/Portion that God has Given You

 Last week I asked you to join me back here today with a cup of coffee or tea. That was partly because there is just something nice about having a warm drink in your hand as you sit down to read or have a chat with a friend, but that wasn't my only reason. In the first chapter of Linda Dillow's book Calm My Anxious Heart, she sets forth a very useful and eye-opening analogy - "The Teacup Analogy". 

Take a look at your cup. What does it look like? Is it a dainty and fragile tea cup? Or is it a strong earthenware mug that's been dropped a million times but yet has never broken? What size is it? How does your cup compare with your personality? Maybe you're holding the strong and sturdy mug, but feeling more like the fragile one! Either way, it is God who has assigned you with that special and unique cup. He did this at the very beginning of your life - "For you formed my inward parts, you knitted me together in my mother's womb" Psalm 139: 13.

Now think about what is in your cup. God has given that too! This is your portion. It includes your "physical and emotional being, [your] abilities, circumstances, roles, and relationships". All of these things have been assigned by God to you because that is what he sees as best.

The cup I have today is a pretty cup that I received from my Secret Sister at the Mom's group I attend. It has the word "March" (my birth month) in golden letters and a beautiful image of Lily of the Valley. I like the cup. And I like what is in it (Coffee!). And I can look at my life right now and think the same thing, but that wasn't always the way I felt!

When I found out I was pregnant with our first I was, of course, ecstatic, overjoyed, delighted, etc! I couldn't wait to be a mom and have a little baby and it was going to be so wonderful and joyful. Everyday I would wake up with a new-found purpose -- because I would be a Mom! I'm sure most new mothers can attest to this feeling. I think it mostly happens, though, if you haven't been around newborns that much prior to having one yourself!

When we met our little pumpkin for the first time, it was a joyful occasion! I still remember the shock that I felt that there was actually a baby inside me all that time. I guess it never really clued in before! She opened her eyes and looked up at me. Wow. You can't get any more amazing than that!

There was an exercise in the book where you had to make a list of all of the positives and negatives in your life and then decide which list you focused on more. If you focus on the negative list, well then that's why you are discontented. I did this exercise and I couldn't really think of any negatives! I saw so many wonderful things! I thought to myself, 'Well, I should be content. Look at all of the blessings! I have a husband, house, and baby. We have food to eat, clothes to where! How can I complain about anything?' But yet, I didn't feel that way *at all*! I was puzzled by this for a long time. I knew that I wasn't content. That was very clear. But I just couldn't figure out why! 

*******************************************************************************************************

To be continued!

My Journey to Contentment

I have been meaning for a long time to begin a series about contentment. Not that this is an area that I have excelled in (despite my blog name!) but rather, I strive toward it and in faith say that I am a Contented Mama!

Our church has a Ladies fellowship group that meets once per month. I have found this to be such a blessing and encouragement to my Christian walk and have grown so much in the discussion of Godly topics and sharing of experiences. We just finished reading through and discussing the book Calm My Anxious Heart: a Woman's guide to finding contentment by Linda Dillow.

It was through the reading of this book that I first thought of my blog name! And also more importantly it was through reading this book that I began to realize my desperate need to strive for contentment and how I may go about that.

The following is an acrostic poem that I wrote as a summary of the book and I intend to cover one letter per week in my series on contentment. So join me here next Tuesday with a cup of coffee/tea and an open heart. May the Lord Bless you and keep you until then!

Contentment is…

Considering the cup/portion that God has given you

Offering a humble heart before God

Not allowing greed to consume your heart

Thanking God for the joys and the trials

Erasing negative thoughts and words

Never Complaining

Taking time to pray when your mind would rather worry

Making God’s purposes your purposes

Ever focussing on Eternity

Noticing the blessings God has given you

Trusting in God’s providence and sovereignty

Pray For Sudan

Let's not forget to be praying for the situation in Sudan this week.

They are undergoing a referendum this week to determine whether the South of Sudan will become an independent nation from the North. (Official results will not be known until Mid-February.)
Of course there are a lot of things that make this difficult:

1. The North is mostly Muslim and the South is a mix of Christian and Animism. Religious tensions galore.
2. There is oil in the South, but the North owns the pipelines. Money tensions galore.
3. If the two areas separate, borders will have to be decided. Possibility of Guerrilla warfare.
4. The North doesn't really think that the South will be able to operate without them. This leaves the threat of more war in this country. Something it doesn't need.

But more than just the political tensions, let's remember the Christians who are in North Sudan. The North, being mostly Muslim has put into practice Sharia law, which equals harsh persecution for Christians and especially for new Christian converts. The separation of the South may cause the Muslims to put this into practice even more.

Please Pray:
(Note: These prayer requests have been copied from http://www.christiananswers.net/q-eden/edn-persecutedchurch.html):

1. For their physical protection and deliverance
2. That God would give them the right words and that they would fearlessly make Christ known
3. That they will see God's grace as sufficient and God's power perfected in their weakness
4. That they would love Christ's appearing all the more
5. That they will rejoice in sharing the sufferings of Jesus so that they will rejoice even more when Christ is revealed
6. That they will endure
7. That they will choose ill-treatment and the reproach of Christ, not pleasures of sin
8. That they will love Christ far more than life itself
9.  That they will live the joy of the Lord before their persecutors
10. That they will love their enemies  

The Contented Papa - My Man

Today I want to showcase someone who is very special to me.

This is the Contented Papa – Peter. 

There is a lot to say about this man. First of all he is a Christian man. He loves the Lord with all his heart, soul, mind, and strength. He seeks to serve and glorify God with everything that he does. He leads our family in bible reading and prayer everyday. He thinks about how he might better lead our family. 

I am so thankful for this.

He works hard and he works smart. He takes his work seriously and he does it with vigor and zeal. He is energetic and motivated. He runs his own business and therefore has to manage his time well. He is learning this skill. It is hard to know how much time to spend with the family and how much time to spend with work. But he is growing and adjusting as he needs to and I am very proud of him!

Peter is intelligent. I remember the first time we walked through a woodland trail.

It was just down the road from the university I was attending and 

we were just getting to know each other. 

As we walked he pointed out latin scientific names of plants, ferns, and wild flowers! Perhaps only a biology major (such as myself) could find that to be not only impressive, but also very romantic! He continues to impress me with his knowledge and understanding and also with his love of learning. 

He inspires me to learn more and love to learn more.

He is not lazy. I don’t think there is a lazy bone in that man’s body! 

He jumps out of bed in the morning ready to take on the day! 

If he is not marking or tutoring he is working on some project in the house, 

running an errand or spending time with his daughter or with me.

Which leads to my next point, he is an Amazing Daddy. 

In his daughter’s eyes, he is the superhero Daddy who can do everything! 

He is fast, tall, strong, talented and funny. 

He has a big grrrowwl that makes her giggle. 

He has strong arms that throw her high into the air. 

He plays beautiful music on the recorder that makes her smile and dance. 

He is the #1 man in that girl’s life. 

And He’s also the #1 man in this girl’s life. 

I love him, honour him, respect him, and cherish him. 

He is my lover and my best friend. He is ready steady all the time. 

He doesn’t waver up and down like I often do. 

He is very consistent and stable. 

He is the kind of man that I can depend on. 

I love you!

Contented Mama is Back!

Today I am feeling much better than I did 6 weeks ago. That is because today, I am 12 weeks pregnant and therefore almost at the end of the 1st trimester! Yes, in case you haven't heard, we are expecting our second baby! He/she is due to arrive sometime around July 25, 2011.

This has brought so much joy! We are very excited and happy to have another little one on the way. Of course we're a little nervous and sometimes feel a bit overwhelmed by the idea, too. I remember those first days with a newborn baby very well. And trying to imagine them with a 17 1/2 month old there in the picture makes me a little dizzy! But we are trying to trust the Lord to get us through all trials of life - the joys and the sorrows.

And he does take us through life one day at a time. The last couple of months have been just exhausting. I've been very tired all the time and find it difficult to complete the basic things each day (which is why I've had to give up internet/blogging time). I've been feeling sick a lot too. Especially because of Baby Food...ewwww. There is sometime about liquefied vegetables and meat that just makes my stomach turn! And food in general has been overall less appetizing and less desirable.

But somehow, the day comes to an end and a new day is given. And the next thing you know a new season of life has come with new joys and new sorrows....

And I am learning that times like this are perfect opportunities to prayerfully sit and watch God carry me through yet again.

"This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. 

It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. 

They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness." 

Lamentation 3:21-23

All Things Work Together for Good

About 2 weeks ago we had a freezer "mishap". Not exactly sure how, but the freezer became unplugged...

Allow me to paint the scene for you:

It is a Monday afternoon. The house has been tidied, dishes done, and baby is napping. I'm thinking that I have it all together so I grab a coffee and sit down to finish reading "Against the Tide: The Valor of Margaret Wilson" by Hope Irvin Marston. For those of you who haven't read this book, I highly recommend it. The genre is historical fiction/biography. The main character is Margaret Wilson, a staunch Covenanter from 17th Century Scotland during the times of oppression and persecution under King Charles II. It is a captivating and convicting story. It also, by the way, has a very intense ending.

So back to the scene. I am on the second-to-last-page of this book.

Tears are filling my eyes. 

I think I forgot to breathe for a minute. 

My face is red with anger. 

My heart pains.

Enter my husband, Peter:
"Umm, Niki. Can you come here?"
A little agitated I say, "Can it wait!?"
"Well, it is kind of important!"
Already feeling a bit guilty about reading for the last hour or so, I decide I had better go.
"It seems that the freezer has been unplugged for a day or two." My husband explains.
"...o.k." I reply calmly. I think to myself that this isn't a big deal. I mean, it's not like I'm being persecuted or anything! It's just a freezer (And a small one at that!).

I get my boots on and we head out the back door into the shed where the freezer sits...

dripping with reddish-purple juice from the thawed berries.

Almost everything is completely thawed. The 24+ cups of Green Pepper that I just put in there. Pumpkin, apples, raspberries, and blackberries all completely thawed. 

Place on top of this the intense mood I was already in because of the book... 

This is where I turn off the camera because my reaction has become less than...

Photogenic.

A little later in the day, after I calmed down and realized that pouting wasn't going to solve the problem, I got out my church directory and called my pastor's wife. They have 3 teenage girls.

"I need to borrow a girl for the day", I said.

She sent me her best girl in the kitchen and the next day we were busy.

We made:

• 5 pumpkin pies
• 2 apple pies
• And a double batch of jam

All before 3pm! That night, feeling like I was on a roll, I made 3 banana loaves and a batch of biscuits for the freezer. Then the next day I made 4 chicken pot pies and froze them too! My freezer is full again, but this time with prepared foods!

I did sit down to finish the book. I cried because of my selfishness and petty nature. I cried also because I didn't understand what God has allowed and still allows His Church to suffer persecution, oppression and martyrdom.

And then I remembered these verses:

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, 

to them who are called according to his purpose. 

For whom he did foreknow, 

he also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son,

that he might be the firstborn among many brethren.

Romans 8:28-29 (emphasis mine)

The Market Day of the Soul

Tomorrow is Sunday.

I love Sundays!

If you are a Christian, Sunday is a day to forget about all of the worldly toils.

It is a day to refresh your spirit.

It is a day to celebrate and look forward to 

The eternal rest offered to you by Christ.

It is a day to focus your energy on Worshiping God.

It is a day to fellowship with other Believers. 

It is a day of Rest for your weary and heavy laden heart.

 It is the Market Day of your Soul.

I often try to have one main day per week when I go to the store to buy my groceries or other things that we need for the week. According to Joseph A. Pipa in his book "The Lord's Day", the Puritans did the same thing(p. 42)! They would have a market where farmers and merchants would come into the town to buy and sell. I always find it neat to learn about how people lived in the past (even the simple things). 

What does this have to do with Sunday? Well, Some of the Puritans often referred to the Lord's Day (Sunday) as the "Market day of the Soul". Just like we may take one day out of seven to run errands and gather food for our family, we must also take one day out of seven to replenish and nourish our Souls (p. 43). 

We must not forget this day! It is Special to God! The 4th commandment states: "Six days shall you labour and do all your work, but the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord your God...". It is His day. It belongs to Him! Not only that though...He gives it to us for our benefit too.  I like how Pipa puts it, "The purpose of the Fourth Commandment is to free us from our daily business so that we may do business with Him (God)" (p. 43). Notice that the purpose is not to inhibit us from doing our normal weekly things, but rather to free us from them! I often need to be reminded of this! 

The Lord's day is a blessing! God is so Gracious to give us one whole day out of seven to especially focus on Worshiping Him and bringing Glory to Him. 

May you all enjoy The Lord's Day Tomorrow!!

Just take 15 min!!

We love squash!

 

 The only problem is that it seems to take sooo much effort to get it ready to eat on the plate. Well, mostly it's the chopping that gets to me. (Either my knives are too dull or my arms just aren't strong enough to cut through the things!) So what do I do? I get my wonderful husband to cut it! :-) 

So today, he chops up the squash for me. Meanwhile, I stand at his side (as his encourager and helpmeet, of course!) and make plenty of ooos and ahhhs over his muscles! ;-)

I was very thankful for his hard work and was sure to reward him with a kiss! *Muah!* He kissed back and smiled...then he left and there it was...

The enormous pile of cut but unpeeled squash.

This is where I look at it, look at the clock and say... "ughhhh...this is going to take sooo muchhhh of my timmeeeeeee........ Maybe I'll work on my puzzle instead!" 

And I did. ha ha! I sat down and looked at all the pieces and thought about how lovely it will look when it is all finished...but the squash was eating away at my mind, the whole time. So I gathered up my courage and said, "Ok, I'm just going to work on peeling the squash for 15 minutes. Then I will go do something else and come back to it."

10 minutes later......

It's in the pot covered in water ready to cook!!!

I can't begin to tell you how many times I go through this same thing every day. Sinks full of dishes, toys all over the floor, laundry piled to the ceiling, etc. You can probably think of your own enormous pile of something that looks like it will take an eternity to do!

I'm going to suggest something very simple, but profound:

15 minutes.

That might be all it takes to clear off that table that you haven't seen in months.

15 minutes.

That might be all it takes to give you hope for the completion of a particular job.

15 minutes.

Just might even be what it takes to pull you out of that downward spiral of depression.

Never underestimate the power of the time the Lord has given you. 

It is precious.

It belongs to Him.

Will you use it for His glory today?