Thanking God for the Joys and the Trials

The next letter on my Contentment Acrostic is "T" - and I filled in the phrase: Thanking God for the Joys and the Trials. (If you have no idea what I'm talking about, read this post!)

Well we know that it is really easy to thank God for the Joys in life! I am so thankful when my 2 year old hugs me and says "I love you mommy". Or when my little 9 1/2 month old greets me with the biggest 2 tooth grin. Or when I hear them both playing and giggling in the other room! My heart melts and I pray with more earnestness than I ever have, "Thank You Lord! Thank you so much for these little blessings!"

But what about thanking God for the trials in life?

    Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.
And let steadfastness have its full effect, 

that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
    (James 1:2-4 ESV)

One thing I have been learning is that each stage of life has it's joys and it's trials...and that's a good thing! James tells us that these trials lead to steadfastness and eventually to perfection! But remembering to find that joy in the midst of it all sure can be a struggle. 

Am I always joyful when my toddler pees in her underwear for the 2nd or 3rd time today!!??
Am I always joyful when the children wake up earlier from their naps than I expected??
Do I always remember the happy moments when baby is teething and cranky??


Paul says:

    I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
(Philippians 4:11-13 ESV)

Even when faced with poverty, imprisonment, lack of food, extremely painful persecution, etc. Paul finds all of his strength and joy in our Lord Jesus Christ and this is his secret to contentment. 

{In perspective, Cranky children seem like a breeze!}

And here is the thing that really hits home for me! 

If I am not finding my joy in Christ alone:

                Rebekah being potty trained is not going to make me more joyful 

                Well-slept children is not going to make me more joyful

                And despite what I may believe during these moments, Having the children all grown up and moved out of the house is also not going to make me joyful.

                

Finding joy in Christ during all of the crazy ups and downs of life is the only solution. It is the only way to have true happiness. It is the only way to be truly content. 

And, as I have been learning in John Piper's  book "When I don't desire God", finding joy in Christ (even in our trials!) is not just something we should do or something that might be a nice thing to do if we want to be happy...It is something that is commanded! As we can see earlier in Phil. 4, Paul says:  

    Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice.
(Philippians 4:4 ESV)

If this is a commandment that we need to obey, doesn't that mean that we are sinning when we are not finding our Joy in Christ? When we are not being thankful for the joys and the trials of our life, is it a sin? While it may be a hard thing to swallow, I believe that it is a truth that we must admit. We must confess it and repent of it!

And when we do repent of our ingratitude toward God and when we do start to see the Joy amidst our trials...when we do start to see our trials themselves as Joy...and when we do start to see Christ as our strength and someone to take Joy in...

Then I believe with the help of Christ, 

we have made another step forward 

on our Journey to Contentment.

linked to: A Wise Woman Builds her Home,

              Growing Home
              Modest Mom

Journy to Contentment - Part 4

I began a series ages ago about contentment... and my intention was to write every Tuesday about my personal journey to contentment (which is certainly not over!) and I sort of wanted to keep that going.

My last post was about offering a humble heart before God as a means to contentment. Today I want to address Greed.

"Discontentment makes rich men poor 

while contentment makes poor men rich." 

Benjamin Franklin

Take a moment to think about everything that you have: All of your possessions: house, furniture, decorations, knick knacks, car, money, clothing...Family: husband, children, parents, siblings...Other Relationships: Church family, elders, friends...

Now realize that none of it actually belongs to you!! It all belongs to God and he is gracious enough to loan it to you. 

With that kind of thinking the next logical thing to realize is that because everything we have has been graciously lent to us, what right do we have to complain and covet about what we do not have!?

And yet, how often in my life do I covet what another has. How often do I become discontent with my house, clothing, car, relationships etc. as though I actually deserved better than what I have! How often do I get those overwhelming "urges" to just go to Walmart or Frenchies not because I truly need something but just because I want something...something...Not sure what it is that I want, but I just know I want something.

Linda Dillow in her book Calm my Anxious Heart reminds us that our Heart Attitude is the issue. She quotes this scripture:

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, 

where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.

But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven,

where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.

for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Matthew 6:19-21

"Ask yourself: Where is my treasure? Where is my heart? Simple questions, yet the answers define who you are and what you are living for...You can quickly identify where your heart is if you will survey the things you own and answer this question: Suppose this treasure were lost, destroyed, or stolen tomorrow. Would I miss it to the point that it would harm my trust in God, my contentment, or my relationships? If the answer is Yes, then your treasure is on earth."

{Side note: During Family worship last evening, I was reminded that our treasure should be Christ and His Word! It is worth far more than silver or gold or jewels.}

I really love this book and enjoyed it so much when we read through it together at our monthly Ladies Fellowship Meetings. In this chapter on greed Dillow gives several practical strategies for rooting out greed in your own life. Here is one that really stuck out to me.

"Cut the Ropes"

Greed is like a large weight attached to you by a rope. Look around your house and ask God to show you where to cut the ropes. 

                 Are there certain items that you tend to cling to or are just simply never contented with? 

                               Give them away! 

                 Are there catalogs or fliers that cause you to covet? 

                               Throw them out!

                 Are there certain friends that give you the greedies?? 

                                Stay away from them! 

                                (Or pray a lot before visiting them if staying away is not an option)

As Matthew 18:8 says "And if your hand or your foot causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to enter life crippled or lame than with two hands or two feet to be thrown into the eternal fire."

A personal area that I always seem to be discontented with is my clothing! I have drawers and a closet stuffed full and yet can never seem to find anything to wear! And I always want to buy more! So my goal this week (after I return from a visit with my Mom, Sister, Brother-in-law, and Brand New Nephew!!) is to go through all of my clothing and give most of them away... And pray that God will make me content with what I have.

Do you have a rope to cut? or perhaps one you have cut in the past? May the Lord continue to convict our hearts of these things. This world is not our home.

To God be all The Glory - an Update

A dear friend of mine said something like this to me a couple of months ago:  

I checked your blog again and noticed that you haven't posted in a long time, does this mean you are not a Contented Mama anymore??

Thanks so much for caring enough to ask! :) Even though I don't deserve it, I am thankful that I am able to say, "Yes, I am still a Contented Mama!"...Unfortunately, I just seem to be a busy contented mama who is still trying to figure out where Blogging can fit in. :-) But I am working on this, as you can see!

My blog today simply has to be an update on the two amazing little blessings that fill our lives with so much joy. I hope it doesn't sound like I'm boasting!! I just want to share with you all how God is helping them grow and learn!  

To Him be all the Glory.

 

Rebekah and Theodore (Or Teddy as he is now officially nicknamed) are growing so much. Rebekah has a lot more hair than she used to and a lot more manners too! She says (with some reminders) "please" and "Oh, thank-you Mommy". "Sorry Teddy", "Excuse me" and "Bless You!" 

She loves to be a help to her brother. If he is crying she does her best to comfort him and will bring him a toy or a blanket to try and soothe him. She has loved him from Day 1! They are going to be great friends.

 Here they both are sitting together in their Sunday best. 

 Teddy is getting brighter and bigger and stronger every day. It is so hard to believe that he is already almost 9 months old! (he is only 6 months old in the picture, which gives away when I began writing this post :P) It just seems like yesterday that he was a little newborn, tiny and helpless and just giving little "puppy-dog kisses". All he knew to do was cry and drink milk and look up with those sweet little eyes. And now here he is (with Daddy's help) riding on the rocking horse! By the way, those cheeks are just the most kissable things! I could kiss them all day! <3 

Speaking about time flying, Rebekah had a birthday on the 18th of February! 2 years old! And she, too, has come a long way. It's amazing how quickly babies develop. If only I could learn like she can! She knows all of the letters and their sounds and loves to sing the alphabet song! We have an alphabet play mat and she loves to play games where I ask her to find a letter or say the sound. She can count to 11, down from 10 and is learning how to count objects. "1-2-3 cats!"

She loves reading and singing! Her favourite songs to sing are "Old McDonald had a farm" and "Twinkle Twinkle little star". And she often recites lines from her favourite books.

She can also answer several catechism and bible questions. She's a little sponge! If only I could take credit for all of her learning! To God be all the Glory

 

Teddy is learning to crawl!And has been learning to crawl for the last 3 months! (But we all learn and grow at our own rates and paces!) In this picture he was only able to crawl backwards, but now he can pull himself along the floor and is really getting along great! He is also eating lots and lots of solids. 

Peas, carrots, squash, sweet potato, corn, banana, avocado, apple sauce,

rice, oatmeal, cream of wheat,

beef, chicken, pork, etc. He loves it all!

 Rebekah is learning to be a helper! She can remove and add clothing from/to the dryer, clean up small spills, "fetch items" like diapers or a blanket, take things to the garbage, clean up her toys/books, and also can set the table (with some help). Her newest chore is helping Daddy with the dishes! She loves doing that!

Here is a pleasant morning moment that I am happy to share with you all! Teddy is happy as can be in his exersaucer and Rebekah is reading him a story.
Praise God for times of peace, love, and joy in the home! 
It makes up for the whining, crying, sniffles, bad attitudes, potty accidents etc. that also happen to be a part of our lives ;) Which we also try to Praise God for!!



 Well, I hope you enjoyed my update. :-)
May we always be thankful and content in our home, not only in the good times, but also in the not-so-good.
For God is unchanging and faithful and good at all times.
<3 I pray this for your homes as well. <3

Welcome Theodore Arthur to the world!

Well our beautiful baby boy finally decided to make an appearance into this world on Saturday July 30th at 1:46 pm during a thunder and lightning storm!

4 Days overdue!

 Theodore Arthur

8 lbs 6 oz

20 in. long

It's a boy!

We're all very happy!

 

Chubby little newborn cheeks!

Journey to Contentment - Part 3

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God

that at the proper time He may exalt you,

casting all your anxieties upon Him,

because He cares for you.

1 Peter 5:6-7

Offering a Humble Heart Before God

This point takes us further along Linda Dillow's book to the chapter called "Worry is like a Rocking Chair". (I didn't go in order of chapters for my acrostic) She hits the nail right on the head with that title! Worrying "will give you something to do, but it won't get you anywhere"! That's so true.

There are certain things that never really worry me. I know God will provide financially. I never worry about not having clothes on my back or a roof over my head. God has placed so many wonderful people in our lives that always seem to be right there when you need them. We have seen God work in these ways over and over again.

But then again, there are other things that can sometimes really get to me. When I first started reading this chapter, it was miscarriage. 

When I found out that we were expecting again I was *delighted!* So happy and excited. So thankful that God would give us another child! And then the sickness began and my spirits began to sink. (I found with both of my pregnancies that this was a very low time for me.) And then worry hit me like a dark cloud. Every time I thought of being pregnant I felt discouraged and afraid. I couldn't fulfill my daily tasks. Even doing laundry and cooking for my family was really hard! 

The reading in the chapter started to make me think about and wonder why I was so fearful and angry. I realized that it was because I knew that it wasn't just the wicked who lost their babies. It was the children of God too. I started thinking of other things that worried me like rape, murder, car accidents, etc. God allows these things to happen to His children!! I heard about a missionary whose orphanage was broken in to. Her husband was killed, she was raped! God why would you allow that!? They were serving you in a foreign land, sacrificing comforts for your name's sake and you would let this happen? I was angry! If I wouldn't let things like that happen to my children, then why would God let them happen to His?

And then I read "Humble yourselves, therefore, under the might hand of God". Let me quote from Dillow. She says it well.

"Many of us have memorized 1 Peter 5:7 and tucked it away to be pulled out whenever we have a problem. Too often, though, in applying the wonderful part about "casting all your cares" we forget the first part about "humbling ourselves under the sovereign, mighty hand of God." Not only are the two verses one thought, they are one sentence! They must be read together and applied together. 

What does it mean to humble ourselves before the mighty hand of God? Humility means to have total trust in God alone. It is the surrender of our total being -- intellect, emotion, will, plans, and judgments. It is relinquishing everything. For me, humbling myself involves yielding to God as the Blessed Controller of whatever situation or person is causing me anxiety."

 Somewhere along the line, I made a mistake about God's character. He is the Blessed Controller. His thoughts are higher than my thoughts. His ways are higher than my ways (Is. 55:9). He can see the whole of creation from beginning to end whereas I can only see one little tiny part. God doesn't just forget about us little specks of dust on this earth (although he has every right to!). He hasn't just forgotten the Moms and Dads who have gone through the terrible loss of a baby. He hasn't just forgotten about that missionary. He has planned everything for a purpose, for His Glory, for our good.

And even though I will never understand it this side of heaven, I just know that I need to humble my heart and trust Him, for he cares for me.

My Journey to Contentment - Part 2C

This will be my final post on the topic of "Considering the Cup/Portion that God has given you". To see the previous part click here.

I began in part 2 speaking about how God has given everyone a beautiful and unique cup. Even Jesus Christ had a cup while he was on this earth. Luke 22:42 shows us our dear Lord and Saviour in Prayer before his Father. He knew the cup that the Father had given him. To die on the cross for the sins of His people. And so he prayed, "Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me." This cup was a very difficult one to bear! We certainly can't blame Him for asking this of His Father. But what he says next shows the ultimate example of submission and for our purposes, contentment. "Nevertheless, not my will, but yours be done."

Dillow points out that what Christ was essentially doing was taking His cup and holding it up to the Father and saying "I accept this cup Father. I know it will be difficult and painful to bear, but I know that Your will and Your plans are perfect and I will follow them for Your glory!"

Is that what I was doing with the cup that God had given me? With the portion of Motherhood? Unfortunately, No. I took a sip of my portion and I spat it out! I took my cup and I smashed it! I didn't want it. Take the cup, God! I'll go find my own cup. Meanwhile, I would be miserable and discontented.

I prayed and asked for the Lord to forgive me for not accepting the cup and portion that He had given to me. I realized that I wasn't thinking about His Glory. I was thinking about my own. I was thinking about my own comforts and pleasures. I was being selfish. 1 John 1:9: "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness". Thank you Lord for that!

The lesson wasn't over though. The Lord still needed to show me in a way that I would never forget! That very same evening I went into my pumpkin's room to check on her and I found her laying perfectly still with her eyes wide open. I stood there for what seemed like hours waiting for her to move or breathe or cry or anything that would tell me that she was still alive! As I waited there I cried out to God in my mind, "I just  learned to accept this cup today and you are going to take it away from me!" Just then, she closed her eyes and turned her head. She was alive!

I left the room very shaken up. My legs were weak, my heart was pounding, I started crying and had to sit down. It was like a slap in the face - one that I deserved!

Of course this scenario of going into the room and wondering if she was still alive had happened many times before and many times since. I'm sure every parent knows of it! But this time, God really seemed to draw out those few seconds!

After this, I wrote in my journal:

I needed that Lord. Thank You. Both for your justice and your mercy. I am learning to accept this cup and portion that you have given! Help me with this! So that I may bring glory and honour to you.

 I am still learning. And God is still helping me. 

My Journey to Contentement - Part 2

Today I am going to share with you the first major step on my journey to contentment. If you missed my introduction to this series, be sure to read it here.

Considering the Cup/Portion that God has Given You

 Last week I asked you to join me back here today with a cup of coffee or tea. That was partly because there is just something nice about having a warm drink in your hand as you sit down to read or have a chat with a friend, but that wasn't my only reason. In the first chapter of Linda Dillow's book Calm My Anxious Heart, she sets forth a very useful and eye-opening analogy - "The Teacup Analogy". 

Take a look at your cup. What does it look like? Is it a dainty and fragile tea cup? Or is it a strong earthenware mug that's been dropped a million times but yet has never broken? What size is it? How does your cup compare with your personality? Maybe you're holding the strong and sturdy mug, but feeling more like the fragile one! Either way, it is God who has assigned you with that special and unique cup. He did this at the very beginning of your life - "For you formed my inward parts, you knitted me together in my mother's womb" Psalm 139: 13.

Now think about what is in your cup. God has given that too! This is your portion. It includes your "physical and emotional being, [your] abilities, circumstances, roles, and relationships". All of these things have been assigned by God to you because that is what he sees as best.

The cup I have today is a pretty cup that I received from my Secret Sister at the Mom's group I attend. It has the word "March" (my birth month) in golden letters and a beautiful image of Lily of the Valley. I like the cup. And I like what is in it (Coffee!). And I can look at my life right now and think the same thing, but that wasn't always the way I felt!

When I found out I was pregnant with our first I was, of course, ecstatic, overjoyed, delighted, etc! I couldn't wait to be a mom and have a little baby and it was going to be so wonderful and joyful. Everyday I would wake up with a new-found purpose -- because I would be a Mom! I'm sure most new mothers can attest to this feeling. I think it mostly happens, though, if you haven't been around newborns that much prior to having one yourself!

When we met our little pumpkin for the first time, it was a joyful occasion! I still remember the shock that I felt that there was actually a baby inside me all that time. I guess it never really clued in before! She opened her eyes and looked up at me. Wow. You can't get any more amazing than that!

There was an exercise in the book where you had to make a list of all of the positives and negatives in your life and then decide which list you focused on more. If you focus on the negative list, well then that's why you are discontented. I did this exercise and I couldn't really think of any negatives! I saw so many wonderful things! I thought to myself, 'Well, I should be content. Look at all of the blessings! I have a husband, house, and baby. We have food to eat, clothes to where! How can I complain about anything?' But yet, I didn't feel that way *at all*! I was puzzled by this for a long time. I knew that I wasn't content. That was very clear. But I just couldn't figure out why! 

*******************************************************************************************************

To be continued!

My Journey to Contentment

I have been meaning for a long time to begin a series about contentment. Not that this is an area that I have excelled in (despite my blog name!) but rather, I strive toward it and in faith say that I am a Contented Mama!

Our church has a Ladies fellowship group that meets once per month. I have found this to be such a blessing and encouragement to my Christian walk and have grown so much in the discussion of Godly topics and sharing of experiences. We just finished reading through and discussing the book Calm My Anxious Heart: a Woman's guide to finding contentment by Linda Dillow.

It was through the reading of this book that I first thought of my blog name! And also more importantly it was through reading this book that I began to realize my desperate need to strive for contentment and how I may go about that.

The following is an acrostic poem that I wrote as a summary of the book and I intend to cover one letter per week in my series on contentment. So join me here next Tuesday with a cup of coffee/tea and an open heart. May the Lord Bless you and keep you until then!

Contentment is…

Considering the cup/portion that God has given you

Offering a humble heart before God

Not allowing greed to consume your heart

Thanking God for the joys and the trials

Erasing negative thoughts and words

Never Complaining

Taking time to pray when your mind would rather worry

Making God’s purposes your purposes

Ever focussing on Eternity

Noticing the blessings God has given you

Trusting in God’s providence and sovereignty